pointless_ (pointless_) wrote in dietingisdeath,

My mum discovered a bin bag of food in my room today. She's "assuming" I've been starving myself. I feel like killing myself. We talked about it, and I denied it, but she came out with shit like "I'm gonna get you help, I'm gonna watch you eat all the time, I don't trust you so i'm going to make you eat more than you usually do, I can't believe your doing this to yourself" And there's me in tears, with a hangover, feeling like a dumb fuck for leaving that in my room, (even though it was hidden) damn her cleaning my room, she never does that, the last time she did she read my diary. I can't lie anymore, she's always going to keep an eye on me, always going to be on my back. I can't deal with this. I can't believe she knows about my ed, aswell as my self harm. I hate her, I hate myself. I hate everything.
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